ShagTees

HTML Start Obama T-Shirt

2009-01-12T05:35:00.002-05:00

Here's your last chance to get this classic 2008 Barack Obama election shirt, just in time for the Inauguration of our 44th President. Production on this, one of the hottest t-shirts of the year, ends soon.

Obama T-Shirts at ShagTees.com - Funny T-shirts for the Sexy People. Oh... and for you too.

OMGWTFBBQ! Best. T-shirt. Ever.

2009-01-11T10:23:00.002-05:00

According to UrbanDictionary.com, OMGWTFBBQ is a meaningless acronym which most often stands for "Oh My God What The F##k Barbeque," used when one wants to emphasize one's own incoherence, lack of understanding, or to mock others. This t-shirt shows the fictional logo of the OMGWTFBBQ shack. It's lip smackin' ROFLMAO good!

OMGTFBBQ

ShagTees.com - Funny T-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Ship Happens

2009-01-08T11:17:00.003-05:00

Here's a little something to wear on that cruise you take this summer.

ShagTees.com - t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Bees: Your Firearms Are Useless Against Them

2009-01-06T07:01:00.004-05:00

There are many great scenes in the Chris Farley - David Spade buddy film "Tommy Boy"...
"That's gonna leave a mark."
"Fat guy in a little coat."
"Tommy want wingy."
and the classic Deer in the backseat.

But my personal favorite is "Bees! Ripping off my flesh! Run! Protect yourselves! Your firearms are useless against them!"

I loved this scene so much, I had to make a t-shirt about. Like to see it? Here it goes...

Bees: Your Firearms Are Useless Against Them

The Video

ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Choppin' Broccoli

2009-01-05T21:51:00.004-05:00

Genius. Pure genius. Dana Carvey pulled a song out of his ass on Saturday Night Live - a song that has become part of our national consciousness.

"The other day, she went downtown. She bought some broccoli. She brought it home. She's... choppin' broccoli. Choppin' broccoli. She's choppin' broccoli! She's choppin' broccoli! She's choppin' broccoli! She chops! Uggh! Shechoppinbroccolaaaayyyyy hey hey hey heeeeeeeeee!"

In honor of that comedic masterpiece, ShagTees.com proudly presents the "Choppin' Broccoli" t-shirt and chef's apron!

Wear it with pride in the kitchen, at the farmer's market and in the whole food section of your favorite organic grocer. Go green! Chop broccoli!

Choppin' Broccoli

The Video

Check out the song performed live...

ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Knights Who Say Ni T-Shirts

2008-12-04T06:34:00.011-05:00

Keepers of the sacred words "Ni", "Peng" and "NeeeWom" and we demand... a Shrubbery!

I love these shirts from Madcap Studios. With "Property of the Knights Who Say Ni" on the front, they look like standard team workout gear for the Knights training center. Wear these when you hit the gym, go running or around town.

The shirts are available in a variety of colors, with a grey, navy and red theme.

This one would make a terrific gift for the Monty Python fan or gamer on your list. They're also popular among the World of Warcraft crowd.

Order now to ensure Christmas delivery.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Enjoy the classic scene of the Knights Who Say Ni from the funniest movie ever made...

ShagTees.com - Funny t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Mythbusters T-Shirts

2008-11-28T10:26:00.005-05:00

One of my favorite TV shows of the last few years has been Mythbusters. In addition to the way cool everyman approach to science, the cute and brainy Kari Byron, the hapless test dummy Buster and blowing stuff up, I always delight in checking out the cool t-shirts worn by the cast and crew.

Now, just in time for Christmas, here's a collection of the best t-shirts for your favorite Mythbusters fanatic. These include the officially sanctioned Discovery Channel gear as well as shirts worn by the cast on the show.

Get Mythbusters T-Shirts at ShagTees.com!

Frankie Say Relax

2008-10-06T06:31:00.005-04:00

I'm a big fan of the 80s and nothing screams eighties quite like those classic t-shirts with big block lettering - "Choose Life", "Feed the World," "Save Ferris", and of course, "Frankie Say Relax." Let's face it, if you didn't have at least one of those in your wardrobe, you just weren't cool.

That's why I love this terrific Frankenstein monster parody of the "Frankie Say Relax" t-shirt. It's clever, funny, and instantly recognizable. Perfect for halloween, classic film buffs, or children of the 80s.

ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Why Do We Love Zombies?

2008-10-01T07:18:00.002-04:00

Move over pirates! Step aside ninjas! The zombie has risen as the premier icon of American pop culture.

The turn of the century has seen a resurgence in the popularity of the zombie. Just a couple years ago, Johnny Depp and the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy made the seafaring swashbuckler the taste dujour. Everyone was celebrating Talk Like A Pirate Day, greeting their mates with Arrggh! Jolly rogers, and their always cool skull designs, rocked apparel. Every costume party included at least one Savvy captain and a couple lusty wenches or sexy pirate girl.

But like the true golden age of piracy, that too has passed. Now our Halloween parties are replete with Undead Savvy captains and sexy zombie pirate girls. It's easy to turn any mundane occupation into a scary Halloween costume. Why go as a corporate lawyer or tax accountant, when you could add a minimum of face makeup and splatter some blood and now you're a zombie corporate lawyer or an undead tax accountant? Scary stuff.

Why slut it up as a sexy nurse when you could be a sexy zombie nurse? Or a sexy zombie pirate wench? Or a sexy zombie catholic schoolgirl? Uh, you get the picture.

Humans vs. Zombies, a modified version of the game of tag, is played vigorously on college campuses.

Pirate t-shirt sales are declining as Zombie t-shirts are all the rage.

Why Zombies?

Why zombies then? Why not vampires - the other undead white meat? Or if you follow the Ninja to Pirate progression to its logical next step - why not Viking? Or Zulu? Or Mongol? Why not jungle headhunters?

Americans have been fascinated with zombies before, but it's significant that we once again have discovered them at this point in history.

Zombies are the undead. Mindless bodies shambling through the streets consuming stuff - in particular, yummy yummy brains. They cannot think beyond their basic instincts ingrained through years of a life steeped in repetition. Much like the people of today's modern society.

Mindless Creatures

The opening sequences of the brilliantly funny film, Shaun of the Dead, captures this perfectly. Our hero wakes up, hungover from a night at his favorite pub (The Winchester Tavern), and shuffles in a fog off to his dead end job at an appliance store (Foree Electric). Running on autopilot, he doesn't notice that the undead have risen leaving a bloody bodies in his favorite convenience store. In fact, nobody else notices either. If you haven't seen this movie, do so now.

The zombie film has always been viewed as an allegory of the state of society. In 1968, George Romero's Night of the Living Dead, told us that "they're coming to get you." Who were they? Your parents, that's who. It was a time of free love, psychedlic drugs, Woodstock - a new enlightenment in which the younger generation (baby boomers) rejected the social norms and mores of their 1950s parents, who mindlessly obeyed the repressive Victorian views of sex and freedom imposed their parents before them.

In 1978, the era of post-Vietnam malaise, post-sixties revolution gave us Dawn of the Dead - a bitter commentary on American consumerism. Surrounded by the undead, survivors of the zombie uprising hole up in a shopping mall (a new invention at the time) as the mindless undead clamored to get in.

Braaaaains!

Why do zombies eat brains? Because, as a metaphor for an ignorant society, that's what they lack.

We don't think about what we consume, what we believe, what we do.

The Rage

The new millenium has brought a new type of zombie - courtesy of the real world fears of the Iraq war, 911 terrorists, biological weapons, and the social anonymity of the Internet. Movies like Resident Evil and 28 Days Later gave us fast zombies.

No longer content to shuffle along aimlessly, today's zombies will chase your ass down. Driven by the rage virus, their minds are dead but their bodies aren't hindered by the atrophy and decomposition of death.

Of course, this parallels the speed of modern life. Information moves on the Internet instantly - allowing the masses to share news and accompanying outrage almost instantly.

The Internet Makes You Stupid

Some would argue that the Internet makes us smarter. The modern zombie movie claims the opposite.

Today's citizen is a creature of habit, living a life of repetition. Watching reality TV shows which require no effort on the part of the view nor the writer. Consuming fast food and gourment coffee. Reading their favorite blogs and surfing their favorite porn (whatever porn that may be). Critical thinking is dead. With hundreds of cable TV channels and thousands of web sites - we no longer have to hear the other side of the story. We can choose the media sources that fit our prejudices - be it Fox News or CNN - and bury ourselves deeper in our own sense of what is "right."

Political discourse has become a zero-sum game. There are only winners and losers, left and right - there is no middle ground. The electorate need only to respond to the hot-button soundbites which reinforce their predilections and leanings and demonize the "opposition."

Outrage moves fast in the information age, as the mindless followers of X political ideology are mobilized to shout down the other. A frightening prospect in an age when society's problems have become increasingly complex.

YOU are the Zombie

Let's face it, no matter how intelligent, aware and critical you believe yourself to be - you're a mindless zombie. If you've never changed your mind or adjusted your way of thinking on an issue after hearing an argument from the other side. If you actually follow the "voting guides" handed to you outside the polling place. If you've ever dismissed someone as a "fascist neocon" or "crazy hippie." If your daily consumption of news and information continually reinforces your political, social, and moral ideologies then you are part of the problem.

Now go out and eat some brains.

Obama Won the Debate

2008-09-27T08:48:00.007-04:00

Okay, so I promised myself that I wasn't going to watch Presidential Debate last night. I was going to kick back with a cold one and watch the UConn-Louisville game. As exciting as the game was (great finish Huskies!), I surfed through the debate and got stuck on it.

I don't particularly like the debates - because, ultimately I don't trust the voters.

People today just aren't that smart and don't look at the issues critically. And this isn't a left-right, Democrat-Republican thing (even though die hards on both sides believe that those who think oppositely are brainwashed idiots). No this is about people as consumers of information.

The average person usually reaches voting age with a slight left-right leaning based on a variety of factors - life experience, parental values (either embracing or rejecting), mentors, teachers, community, readings, tv shows, news media, comedians, celebrities, etc). Once established we tend to gravitate towards news media, friends, and information sources that reinforce that leaning (MSNBC vs Fox, Michael Moore vs Talk Radio, etc). We cease intellectually dissecting issues and challenges and instead parrot back the soundbites that our favorite media outlets have fed us.

Face it. Conservative leaners will not vote for Democrats. Period. Progressive leaners will not vote for Republicans. Period.

Now, the parties are going after the middle ground, the undecideds. I would hope that these people would exercise some critical thinking, but I doubt it. Whichever side shouts the loudest and hits the right "hot button" soundbite will win that person's vote. It's a zero sum game.

So why do I think Obama won the debate? Two reasons. For the most part, I thought it was a stalemate. Obama leads in the polls. McCain needed to make up ground he didn't. Secondly, Obama talked tough on Afghanistan, almost hawkish. While this makes his liberal base absolutely bristle and shudder they still won't abandon him. So he gained a little credibility with some dissatisfied conservatives. McCain had the opportunity to do the same by talking up alternative energy sources, but chose not go there. Game. Set. Match. Obama.

Now, mind you, this is my analysis of what I think happened, not how I necessarily feel about the issues.

Soundbite Politics

I disheartens me that things have come to this. I hate soundbite politics because it makes us all stupid.

Please, don't prove me right.

This election day, there's more on the plate than the Presidency. There are national, state and local legislative seats up for grabs as well. Please take the time to learn about these races - because they are much more important than the Presidency. These are the races that will affect you and your community.

Take the time to carefully read the platforms of candidates for both sides. Educate yourself. Don't vote based on soundbites. If you need those "voter's guides" they hand out to you at the polling place, then you shouldn't be voting at all.

Vote as an informed citizen... or stay the fuck at home.

Get the best Barack Obama T-Shirts at ShagTees.com

September Free T-Shirt Winner

2008-09-23T05:53:00.004-04:00

Congratulations to Hooman N. of Athens, Georgia. He is the lucky winner of a brand-spankin new, absosmurfly free t-shirt from ShagTees.com!

You too can win free tees in our monthly drawing by joining our Facebook Fan Club. For official rules and more information, visit...
http://www.shagtees.com/free_stuff.shtml

Hooman Joins our Elite Group of Previous Winners...
Pete B.
Casey L.
Dave B.
Alex G.
Zhen L.

Will you be next??? Sign up now and find out.

ShagTees.com - T-shirts for the Sexy People. Oh... and for you too.

Best. Obama Shirt. Ever.

2008-09-08T05:25:00.006-04:00

Code monkeys vote. They also wear some of the coolest t-shirts, often with messages that the rest of the world don't get because they don't know computer programming code.

This shirt uses simple HTML code to "End Bush. Start Obama." You've seen this shirt being worn at Obama rallies on college campuses across the country. Wanna look hip and support the cause at the same time? This is the shirt to get.

HTML End Bush Start Obama Political Geek T-Shirt

ShagTees.com funny t-shirts for the sexy geeks. Oh... and for you too.

A Little Video About The Real McCain

Is John McCain too old to be President?

2008-09-07T15:31:00.014-04:00

Is John McCain too old to be president?

Columnist Anna Quindlen opined that each year in the Oval Office is roughly equivalent to seven years in the life of an ordinary citizen. That means that the 71 year old McCain will effectively turn 99 at the end of his first term if elected; 127 if re-elected.

The flip side to that of course is the 47 year old Barack Obama who would turn 75 at the end of his first term and exit the Presidency a bouncy, chipper 103 (in Quindlen years).

Ultimately, we end up with an old geezer any way. The question is "does it matter?"

According to a Pew Research Center survey, only 4% of voters say they would be “less likely” to vote for a black candidate, compared with 11% for a woman, while 50% said they would be less likely to vote for someone “in their 70s.”

Attacks on McCain’s age have been fairly limited so far, but there are signs it is picking up. A new site, www.youngerthanmccain.com, features a tongue-in-cheek video (“The dude’s older than Velcro”) lists all the things that are, well, younger than McCain.

For those of you who think that McCain is a little, well, long in the tooth, ShagTees proudly offers this completely accurate depiction of John McCain on a t-shirt so that you can proudly show you opinion. Get it in a variety of patriotic colors. You probably saw these worn on the floor of the Democratic National Convention as well worn by protesters outside the Republican convention.

McCain - Funny Anti-McCain Pro-Obama T-Shirt

ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Get Your "Talk Like a Pirate Day" T-Shirts and Pirate Lawyer Gear

2008-09-03T05:35:00.009-04:00

Arrgghh! Get down on your knees! Swab me deck and walk me plank!

Okay, so the pirate thing has slowed down a bit, what with the completion of Disney's "Pirates of the Caribbean" trilogy and the rise of Zombies as the pop culture darling dujour. But there's still a charm about pirating - it's cool to walk around with skulls and swords and shouting Aaarrgggh!

And let us not forget that September 19 is approaching - International Talk Like a Pirate Day! The day when it is completely permissable call your professor a scurvy dog before dancing a hornpipe on your imaginary pegleg.

What I like about the t-shirts from Pirate Booty Shorts (www.piratebootyshorts.com) is that they've nicely combined the traditional and the creative. You can get a t-shirt replica of the battle flags of all the major pirates - Blackbeard, Calico Jack, Thomas Tew, Stede Bonnett, Henry Every, Emanuel Wynne, Edward England, Christopher Moody and Black Bart.

You've also got a goodly number of shirts inspired by the Johnny Depp Captain Sparrow films.

Of course my personal favorites are the tributes to the last true remaining pirates of the modern world - of course I'm talking about Lawyers. Check out the "Arrtorney at Law" funny pirate lawyer t-shirt and "Lawyers Do It for the Booty" or "Lawyers - Lie Cheat Pillage." I love these shirts.

Just imagine an attorney approaching the bench "Now your honor, though me a client be a scurvy dog he be not guilty of pillaging that wench." To which the judge replies "Avast, he be downloadin illegal copies of Indiana Jones and Dark Knight, keelhaul him and then walk the plank. Arrgghh!"

Visit www.piratebootyshorts.com for funny pirate t-shirts.

Arrtorney at Law - Pirate Lawyer T-shirt

Lawyers - Lie Cheat Pillage T-shirt

Black Pearl Distilleries Captain Sparrow's Rum - Two Sided T-Shirt

Blackbeard T-shirt

Thomas Tew's Battle Flag T-shirt

Blackbeard's Battle Flag Jolly Roger T-shirt

Transylvania T-Shirt

2008-08-30T05:32:00.005-04:00

Science fiction! Double feature! Doctor X will build a creature! See androids fighting! Brad and Janet! Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet. Wo oh oh oh oh oh. At the late night, double feature, picture show!

Here's one for all the citizens of Transylvania and virgins alike. "Transylvania: It's Fantastic" a funny faux tourism shirt featuring a map of the country/planet of Transylvania, swarming vampire bats, and a tagline that gives a nod to the country's most famous export, the vampire Count Dracula.

Wear it for Halloween or at your next Rocky Horror party. It's Fangtastic!

Transylvania: It's Fangtastic!

Get it at ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Zombie Hunting Champion T-shirt

2008-08-28T22:03:00.009-04:00

College is back in session and you know what that means... HVZ baby! Humans vs. Zombies. Zombies vs. Humans.

A couple years ago, the Humans versus Zombies role playing game swept across college campuses by storm. The ultimate goal of the game is for either all Humans to be turned into Zombies, or for the humans to survive a set amount of time. Humans defend themselves using socks or dart guns, stunning the Zombie players; Zombies are unarmed and must tag the Humans to gain a kill and avoid "starvation", forcing them out of the game. Safe zones are established so that players can eat and sleep in safety.

Zombie culture is big now, thanks to hit movies like 28 Days Later, Shaun of the Dead, Resident Evil, Land of the Dead, Army of Darkness, Dawn of the Dead and others. You'll look cool strolling across campus in one of these bad boys. It looks especially killer in black, brown and military green.

2007 Intramural Zombie Hunting Champion

Get it ShagTees.com - t-shirts for the sexy people. Oh... and for you too.

Drink Like A Champion Today Football Tailgate T-Shirt

2008-08-28T21:40:00.003-04:00

College Football is back in swing this weekend. It is indeed the best time of the year. Cool afternoons, turning leaves, meat smoking on the grill, beer flowing and school spirit running deep.

Fall is the time for tailgating and this is the perfect t-shirt to wear while partying it up before the game. This "Drink Like a Champion Today" shirt is a parody of the classic Notre Dame Fighting Irish locker room sign which the players touch before heading out the tunnel and onto the field.

Hey if you're going to drink on football Saturdays, you need to go all out - Drink Like A Champion Today!

Drink Like A Champion Today - Football Tailgate T-Shirt

Get it at ShagTees.com - T-Shirts for the Sexy People. Oh... and for you too.

Size Matters featured on Tuesday Teez

2008-08-27T07:01:00.003-04:00

On every Tuesday of the month, TuesdayTeez.com picks the best t-shirts on the internet and presents them to you.
This week's edition of Tuesday Teez features one of ShagTees' best-selling geek and nerd shirts. "Size Matters" is a clever play on old-school penis jokes, featuring an image of a brain, because in the long run intelligence trumps all.
"Size Matters" (brain) funny nerd t-shirt

Get the Size Matters T-shirt only at ShagTees.com

Ludicrous Speed

2008-08-20T06:09:00.008-04:00

A bunch of my buddies are into cars - sports cars to be exact. Ferrari, Lotus, Triumph, Porsche, etc. They tinker in the garage. They watch Formula One. They Tivo "Top Gear" on BBC America. They even take their cars to a nearby road track to "race".

They also happen to love great movies. This shirt was designed with these gearhead guys in mind.

I proudly introduce "Eleventh Gear" and "Ludicrous Speed".

Eleventh Gear

Eleventh Gear is the motorsports enthusiast's homage to Nigel Tufnel of Spinal Tap, who proudly told the world that his guitar amplifiers "go to eleven". Well our new gearshift goes to eleven as well. Most blokes will be driving as fast they can, gears all the way up - where can you go from there? Well when I want that extra push over the cliff, I can gear up to Eleven. It's One faster.

Ludicrous Speed

Ludicrous Speed takes the Eleventh Gear joke and adds a reference to another classic 80s comedy movie - Mel Brooks' Spaceballs. In this Star Wars parody,the inept villain Dark Helmet (played brilliantly by Rick Moranis - I See Your Schwartz is as Big as Mine) chases after the heroes but cannot catch up. With Light Speed not getting the job done, he cranks his spaceship's engines up to Ludicrous Speed. The result is a big ol plaid mess.

Get these funny t-shirts only at ShagTees.com

Obligatory Video Clips

Funny Spinal Tap Spaceballs Gearhead t-shirts at ShagTees.com

Got Blood? - Halloween Vampire T-Shirt

2008-08-16T09:34:00.009-04:00

"Got Blood?" Vampire and gore fans will love this "Got Milk" parody t-shirt. Wear it at your Halloween party or your next gathering to watch Buffy, Angel, Moonlight, Blade, Kindred The Embraced, Blood Ties or Forever Knight.

Make Your Own Authentic Vampire Costume

Use this shirt as the basis for your very own Urban Vampire costume. Check out this terrific instructional video on how to make a pair of realistic looking vampire fangs.

ShagTees.com - t-shirts for the sexy people... oh and for you too

The Manatee - Nature's Nautical Speed Bump

2008-08-14T06:06:00.003-04:00

Okay, we're all for saving endangered species, but come on. When doing so begins to inconvenience our private personal recreation time, you've got to draw the line. Who do these sea cows think they are anyway? I'm talking about the manatee - scourge of Florida's boating community.

Local governments along the Manatee River recently passed ordinances dropping boat speeds in specific areas.

In Tampa, local manatees are up to no good - wrecking crab nets and ending up in rehab.

For all of you boaters and wildlife lovers out there, you can now enjoy this politically incorrect, funny t-shirt - "The Manatee - Nature's Nautical Speed Bump". Wear it to your next Save the Wetlands or PETA meeting and be the hit of the party.

Get it in a variety of styles and colors only at ShagTees.com.

Win Free T-Shirts! Visit ShagTees to find out more.

ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people... oh and for you too.

Funniest, Most Offensive Yet Intellectual T-Shirt... EVER!

2008-08-13T05:43:00.008-04:00

I'd like to take a moment to pay homage to the best offensive t-shirt ever made. This piece of brilliance comes from the folks at T-Shirt Hell, who specialize in making shirts that take a certain attitude and big set of balls to actually wear in public.

The winner of the best offensive shirt ever is... "Slavery: Gets Shit Done".

When I first saw this shirt, I laughed steadily for a good 10 minutes. I'd stop, look away and collect myself, then look and bust out all over again. Seriously, I couldn't breathe.

This shirt manages to be both crude and intellectual at the same time. Highbrow meets lowbrow. Truly brilliant. Let's take a look...

First off, the shirt is beautifully designed - the iconic imagery is easily recognizable and the fonts bring the message to the forefront from any distance. The shirt is designed for maximum visual impact.

Next, the joke itself. I mean really, slavery is offensive anywhere in the world. In the United States, the word immediately brings to mind the enslavement of blacks in the first half of the country's history. But this shirt brilliantly sidesteps that particular flaming paper bag on the doorstep and takes us back to a few thousand years ago and ancient Egypt's enslavement of its own people (as well as captives from enemy neighbors).

It's easy to forget that one of the most iconic, easily recognized and universally admired objects on the planet was built with slave labor. Think about it, did any of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World just happen? We look back on these marvels and think "Wow! How did they do that way back then?" Well, here's your answer...

Slavery. Gets Shit Done.

Mona Lisa Ninja on TuesdayTeez

2008-08-12T20:05:00.004-04:00

Mona Lisa Ninja, one of the best selling t-shirts of the summer, has made this week's Tuesday Teez. Drop by Tuesday Teez and cast your vote for Mona Lisa Ninja as this week's top t-shirt.
Get your own Mona Ninja T-Shirt in regular or super stealthy style...

Get it at ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for the sexy people... oh and for you too.

NSFW - Not Safe For Work

2008-08-10T22:04:00.004-04:00

NSFW - Not Safe For Work. You've seen this warning in e-mail messages that your buddies send you, and you know that it's going to be good stuff. Heh heh. Just make sure the boss isn't looking over your shoulder or you'll get busted for porn.

This funny t-shirt says "Content Has Been Rated - NSFW - Not Safe For Work - By Shagtees.com for the protection of the moral fiber of the country."

Whether you are a complete hottie or a hardly working slacker, this shirt is for you.

Get this funny t-shirt at ShagTees.com

TuesdayTeez.com Loves ShagTees

2008-07-29T07:18:00.009-04:00

Every week, Tuesday Teez highlights a select group of the freshest, coolest t-shirts on the internet. They regularly feature shirts from some of my personal favorite shops like Detour Designables, Flippin Sweet Gear and BurnTees.

This week, ShagTees makes its first appearance on Tuesday Teez with one of our best summertime sellers - "Stop. Hammertime." This homage to one of rap's greatest entertainers and the coolest looking shark in the sea has been flying off the shelves as the Discovery Channel's "Shark Week" has driven the country into shark mania.

Check out Tuesday Teez every Tuesday morning. And don't forget to VOTE for "Stop. Hammertime." as your top tee shirt of the week.

ShagTees.com - T-shirts for the sexy people... Oh and you too.

I Don't Feel Tardy

2008-07-29T00:14:00.005-04:00

Okay, seriously. Just what is "tardy" anyway?

tar·dy (tärd)
adj. tar·di·er, tar·di·est
1. Occurring, arriving, acting, or done after the scheduled, expected, or usual time; late.
2. Moving slowly; sluggish.

From the Middle English meaning slow. As it RE-tard-Ed.

It's a funny sounding word, but too many and you could make a serious mark on your *Permanent Record*.

All you high schoolers out there, I'm going to let you in on a little secret - there is no such thing as a permanent record. What you go away with in high school will not affect your ability to land a position with that swanky law office - on the other hand, your lack of education, breeding and refined sophistication *will* do the job on your behalf.

Join the Slacker Nation and get this funny t-shirt so you can demonstrate your rebellious nature to the whole world.

Get this and other funny t-shirts at ShagTees.com >>>

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New ShagTees Shirt - Dancer: Stripping My Way Through College

2008-07-27T09:37:00.003-04:00

Funny Dance T-shirt. Let's face it, dancing is hard work. There's always a little attitude with dancers, and usually a wicked sense of humor. Show up in the studio wearing this and watch all the heads turn.

The shirt features the graceful silhouette of a female dancing with the word "Dancer" flowing over it. Underneath "Dancer" is the tagline "stripping my way through college" in a ripple.

Get it only at ShagTees.com Funny T-Shirts

New Shagtees! Awesome, LOLcats

2008-07-26T07:22:00.007-04:00

We've been busy here at ShagTees, cranking out new t-shirts for back to school. Check out some of our latest creations...

Rated Totally Awesome

The contents of this shirt have been rated "TTLY A". Look stylish hanging out at your locker with this clever combination of video game rating and text message speak. The red is smoking but we've got other colors available.

LOLCat I Iz On Ur Shirt

You don't have to be a cat person to *get* LOLCats. They're hilarious. Check em out at icanhascheezburger.com. This screened back LOL cat is hanging out - "I Iz On Ur Shirt".

Get these and other great t-shirts at ShagTees.com >>>

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Graphic Tees That Rock from Reverie Apparel

2008-07-20T16:28:00.009-04:00

Here at ShagTees, we don't make those cool graphic design t-shirts that you see on all the rock stars, deejays, and club hoppers. Being a bunch of smartasses, we're more concerned about making funny shirts, so we leave that stuff to the artsy types. Of course that doesn't mean don't love to wear graphic tees - we do - you know for important stuff like weddings and job interviews where more formal attire is required.

We recently discovered tees by Reverie Apparel. They look great and they're original - not the same crap that everybody else is wearing. (I'm talking to you pimply-faced-gothboy hangin out at Hot Topic).

Here are some faves...

Mike Walker

This one's a classic, clever homage to the Star Wars trilogy. I picked up one of these for a deejay friend of mine.

Promise

This is one of those shirts that you've got to look twice at. No it's not the praying hands, but something slightly more cynical. Nicely done.

Mixtape

My favorite. Long before there were iPods, iTunes and mp3s, you had to mix your own personalized tapes - every one a labor of love, filled with meaning, deep thoughts and personal expression. Ah the memories. I'm wearing this shirt now as I blog. Getting a little misty eyed... gonna need a moment.

Get these and other great original graphic tees from Reverie Apparel >>>

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2008-07-16T00:18:00.004-04:00

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Shark Week!

2008-07-15T23:53:00.006-04:00

Ladies and gentlemen - the time has come once again. Oh yes! It is Shark Week on the Discovery Channel.

If you're like me, then you can't get enough documentary TV in your life. Sure, Deadliest Catch and Dirty Jobs kick ass, and there's nothing more educational than Blue Planet.

But when Shark Week rolls around we're talkin some serious TV.

And in honor of that silent deadly 1 million year old eating machine known as the shark I give you the two week old tribute to the two-decade 90s hip hop star.

STOP! HAMMERTIME!

This t-shirt features a hammerhead shark alongside one of the greatest musical lyrics of the 1990s. You can't touch this!

Stop. Hammertime. - Funny Shark T-Shirt

ShagTees.com - T-shirts for the sexy people... Oh and you too.

Shark Attack!

Jaws - The Lego Edition

Sharks with Frickin Laser Beams Attached to their Heads

Get it at ShagTees.com!

Never Forgets - Funny T-Shirt

2008-07-13T10:05:00.003-04:00

Forget that dinosaur shirt you've seen other people wearing. Go with an evolutionary survivor. Unlike the brontosaurus, who had a brain the size of a walnut, an elephant "Never Forgets."

Get it at Shagtees.com - T-shirts for the sexy people... oh and for you too.

Have You Seen Junior's Grades

2008-07-09T23:01:00.005-04:00

And the Cradle Will Rock! Anyone who caught the awesome Van Halen Reunion tour this year... albeit between Eddie's stints in Rehab - cannot help but relive the glory days from the Women and Children First album.

This shirt commemorates one of the greatest "filler" lines in rock and roll history. In a song about a slacker going bad - running with gangs, losin sleep and winding up tied with who he meets - he's unemployed, his folks aren't overjoyed - the despondent father remarks "Have you seen Junior's grades?" {insert ripping Eddie Van Halen guitar solo here}

Some things never change. Whether the wayward boy has become hooked on gaming and World of Warcraft or done something really stupid like majoring in philosophy, nothing quite says "American Family" like the father's disappointment in his loser son.

Brings a tear to my eye, man. I need a moment.

This t-shirt features a retro icon of the disappointed alcoholic father lamenting that his son is a dumbass. Get it now at Shagtees.com.

Shagtees.com - T-shirts for the Sexy People... Oh and for you too.

Runnin' With The Devil - funny runners t-shirt

2008-07-07T07:34:00.005-04:00

Our local Hash House Harriers group meets at a local pub after the run. Inevitably, the bartender, a wiry leathery sprite of a woman asks "What have you been doing? You look like you've been running with the devil." The joke never gets old. Linda, this shirt's for you.

ShagTees.com - Funny T-shirts for the Sexy People... oh and for you too.

Gourmet Coffee is for Suckers Funny T-Shirt

2008-07-03T13:02:00.008-04:00

Mmmmmm. Coffee. Slurp.

I love a good cuppa joe, but I just don't understand why people will stop in at these fancy coffee shops on their way to work and stand in line for half an hour to order a "tall half caf double frappacino latte easy on the foam, no better make it a grande" only to walk out of Coffee Republic 20 minutes late for work and at least $5 poorer.

I make it in on time having already consumed 3 large mugs of good coffee brewed at home while casually reading the newspaper.

Is it the convenience? Is this other guy too busy to fix his own coffee and breakfast before heading out to the office? No. Not if he's got time stand in line at Starbucks, while the rest of us are waiting to start the meeting until Mr. Refined Taste for Java decides to grace us with his presence.

Let's face it. Gourmet Coffee is for Suckers. Fools and their money, soon parted.

Now you can get a t-shirt or coffee mug that says just that. Wear it to your next Poetry Slam and you'll get a round of finger snaps.

Get it at Shagtees.com

Small is Tall - Proof That Coffee Snobs Are Idiots

One Man Visits 171 Starbucks in a Day

Lewis Black Rants (Big Surprise There)

ShagTees.com Funny T-Shirts for the Sexy People... Oh, and for you too.

Evil Genius - Bent on World Domination Funny T-Shirt

2008-07-03T00:42:00.006-04:00

Let's face it, we're all evil. Some of us just have higher aspirations.

This shirt is for the uber-evil, not merely the quasi-evil. We want nothing less than world domination. Much like Stewie Griffin, Blofeld, Dr. Evil and Madonna.

Get this kickass Evil Genius T-shirt at ShagTees.com.

Dr Evil

Stewie Griffin Hits the Red Carpet

Madonna has 4 Minutes to Dominate the World

ShagTees.com - T-Shirts for the Sexy People... Oh and for you too.

Slacker Panda T-Shirt

2008-06-30T21:42:00.004-04:00

Finally now you know the truth on why Panda bears are an endangered species. They're fat, lazy slackers with no interest in sex. They lounge around all day watching Mythbusters, playing video games, sucking down Red Bulls and eating takeout food... Okay, they eat bamboo shoots but I'd bet my life on the Mythbusters part.

With the proliferation of all things China this summer - from earthquakes to the Beijing Olympics to the Jack Black Tour de Force "Kung Fu Panda" - what better way to honor and celebrate the Chinese people and culture than to celebrate their most significant contribution to the animal kingdom.

An animal that is too lazy to have sex!

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... the Panda Bear - Darwinism at work.

Get this cool Panda t-shirt at Shagtees.com.

Bonus Clip: Jack Black discusses Kung Fu Panda

ShagTees - T-shirts for the Sexy People. Oh, and for you too.

I'm Positive I Lost an Electron - Funny Science T-Shirt

2008-06-24T13:10:00.006-04:00

It's time to start shopping for Back To School. When you hit campus this fall, be sure to sport this funny t-shirt. Your chemistry professor will remember your name and slide you all kinds of extra credit when she sees your sophisticated intellectual sense of humor.

This design features an illustration of an atom with a runaway electron escaping and bouncing across the shirt underneath the phrase "I'm Positive I Lost An Electron."

The design looks especially good on dark shirts. Also available on coffee mugs, buttons, caps and mouse pads.

Shagtees.com - T-Shirts for the Sexy People... Oh and for you too.

Make Money with ShagTees

2008-06-21T15:26:00.002-04:00

Do you have a blog? website? MySpace or Facebook page?

You can use it to make money with our Affiliate Program. Simply sign up and then place one of our snazzy ads on your page.

It's quick. It's easy. It's profitable.

Just go to our affiliates page and get started on the road to legal easy money today.

Stonehenge Rocks Funny T-Shirt

2008-06-20T08:05:00.005-04:00

"Stonehenge Rocks" This funny t-shirt features the Stonehenge rock formation accompanied by the prototypical "____ Rocks!" slogan. This a nice play on words with a subtle, classic sophistication to it, but still cool enough for hip crowd.

Of course, like the classic Spinal Tap song, the shirt tends to understate the hugeness of the object but at least it's not in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.

Get it at ShagTees.com

Some Spinal Tap Moments

Nigel Tufnel discusses the history of Stonehenge

Best. Rock Performance. Ever.

ShagTees.com Funny T-Shirts for the Sexy People... Oh and For You Too

Why the Long Face? - Funny Easter Island T-Shirt

2008-06-19T07:40:00.010-04:00

"Why the Long Face?" This funny t-shirt features a Moai - the iconic Easter Island big head statue. It's a perfect summer shirt for world travelers, geeks, anthropologists, surfers and beach bums.

Get it at ShagTees.com

ShagTees.com Funny T-Shirts for the Sexy People... Oh and For You Too

American Pi T-Shirt

2008-06-18T06:40:00.007-04:00

It all started back in my freshman calculus class. We had this professor who was always making corny jokes.

One day, we were talking about the hilarious comedy movie "American Pie" and he overheard us. Next thing you know, he's up at the board and drew this big blob that sort of looked like a map of the USA with this ridiculously long string of numbers in it - 3.14159265358979323846.. and so on.

He turns around; looks at us with this big grin on his face and says "American Pi! Get it?".

We all looked at each other dumbfounded and then burst into laughter.

So in honor of one of my favorite teachers, ShagTees.com is proud to offer "American Pi" - a funny, punny and patriotic tee for mathematicians and college professors.

Get it at ShagTees.com...

ShagTees.com - funny t-shirts for sexy people... oh and for you too.

Cheerleading Camp T-Shirts

2008-06-09T18:00:00.005-04:00

It's time again for summer camps and no camp is more intense than cheerleading camp. This is where hard work, pom poms, pyramids and team spirit meet. You've worked hard to make next year's squad and now you've got to put in the workouts to show you earned it. What better way to fit than to have ultra cool t-shirts for practice and workouts?

This summer, wear these great shirts inspired by the classic cheerleader comedy movie Bring It On, starring Kirsten Dunst, Eliza Dushku and Gabrielle Union. Shirts are inspired by the uniforms and workout gear of the Rancho Carne High School Toros and the East Compton High School Clovers.

Remember, don't drop the spirit stick!

"Rancho Carne Toros Cheerleading t-shirt"

"East Compton Clovers cheerleading t-shirt"

Here a couple more Rancho Carne and East Compton shirts from Madcap Studios...

"Rancho Carne Toros Cheerleading practice t-shirt"

"East Compton Clovers XXL Cheerleading practice t-shirt"

Mona Ninja T-Shirt

2008-06-01T09:03:00.003-04:00

This clever tee looks great in black, navy and military green. It features the Mona Lisa in her side occupation as a Renaissance ninja. The most recognizable eyes in history are revealed beneath a menacing ninja hood with katana sword strapped to her back. Great gift for art history buffs and closet ninjas.

"Mona Ninja" funny art history ninja t-shirt

Size Matters

2008-05-21T07:45:00.004-04:00

It's graduation time. Need the perfect gift for the high school graduate? Something that they can wear when they go off to college? Well look no further.

The "Size Matters" Brain t-shirt is the perfect expression of academic prowess and intelligence combined with the coolness of a witty t-shirt. Also available as a coffee mug, mouse pad and button.

Get em now.

"Size Matters" (brain) funny nerd t-shirt

Summer Camp T-Shirts

2008-05-20T07:39:00.001-04:00

Summer is here and you're looking for a cool, funny, yet dryly subtle and witty t-shirt for your vacation wardrobe. Well look no further.

The "Camp Morningwood" shirt looks completely legitimate to squares, yet carries off the morning erection joke three times. The text: "Camp Morningwood - pitching tents since 1969. Rise with the sun. Come for the fun."

Wear it to vacation bible school, on the job, college orientation, June weddings, you name it. Those in the know will be sniggering while the adults won't even give it a second glance.

"Oh yeah, I was a counselor in training at Camp Morningwood since my early teens. Ahh good times."

This shirt was designed especially for colored t-shirts but is available on white as well.

Dropping F Bombs

2008-05-19T12:31:00.000-04:00

So this evening news anchor, Sue Simmons, slipped up with a huge on-air gaffe. She forgot that she was live and let an F-Bomb fly at the end of a teaser segment for the nightly news. While the video showed a preview for an upcoming segment, you hear her blurt out “What the F*ck are you doing!?!” at co-anchor Chuck Scarborough who was piddling on his laptop.

Wow! Only in New York! Well, not really... I've been known to drop an F-Bomb or two (thousand) in my day. But you just gotta love it when someone in the public eye lets one slip.

If you've been living under a rock for the last few weeks and haven't seen the video, here's a clip....

Droppin F Bombs T-Shirt

In honor of Ms. Simmons and her command of the English language, ShagTees.com is putting one of its top selling t-shirts, "Droppin F Bombs", on sale. You can look sharp and witty all at once wearing this dark tee with a vintage WWII bomber dropping Fs on unsuspecting victims in your pants. The charcoal gray and military green shirts look especially cool.

Enjoy!

Cuddy Strips for House

2008-05-15T06:35:00.001-04:00

Network TV just got a whole lot better. In Monday's episode of Fox medical drama "House, M.D.", we got a very nice racy striptease as part of a good girl gone bad fantasy. Seeing the normally uptight hospital administrator Dr. Lisa Cuddy (played by Lisa Edelstein) dressed up in a sexy catholic schoolgirl outfit writhing on the strippers pole as part of one of Dr. Gregory House's delusional fantasies was the highlight of the night. The show is usually pretty intense, but this episode upped the ante.

For those who missed it...

And of course, we would be remiss if we didn't share some appropriate t-shirts celebrating the intelligent young women of America's strip clubs - working their way through college to become doctors and hospital administrators. Please give to the United Strippers College Fund - Making A Difference One Dollar at a Time!

Democratic Primary T-shirts

2008-05-14T07:08:00.000-04:00

Let's face it - politics makes for great t-shirts. Anyone that knows me, knows that I'm no fan of New York Senator Hillary Clinton. If she wins the 2008 presidential election, I'll probably leave the country (just like Rosie O'Donnell, Alec Baldwin, and other hypocritical celebrities did when W beat Al Gore). However, President Hillary Clinton would be great for the t-shirt business. Here's a few anti-Hillary shirts for your chesty pleasure, as well as a couple Barack Obama t-shirts.

The Origin of 420

2008-04-20T05:46:00.000-04:00

April 20 is National errr "Smokers" Day - the day when potheads across the United States get together to enjoy a toke.

The 4:20 celebration at the University of Colorado (from CollegeHumor)

The use of the term "420" to refer to marijuana use or cannabis culture has been around since the 70s and has woven itself subtly into general pop culture...

The score of the football in Fast Times at Ridgemont High was 42-0.

Most of the clocks in Pulp Fiction are set to 4:20.

Online dating sites and roommate ads will often pronounce that they are "420 friendly" to indicate that they like to light up

The state of California's bill regarding medical marijuana is called Senate Bill 420.

But where does the term come from?

Popular myths (all untrue) contend that 420 is the police code for a cop spotting miscreants smoking herb, or that April 20 is the day Jimi Hendrix and Jim Morrison died (incorrect it was September 18 and July 3 respectively), or that there are 420 active ingredients in marijuana (actually there are 315 chemical compounds).

The Real Story

But the truth is that the term originated as you would expect - from a bunch of stoners who decided to meet a specified time after school to light up. The group, known as the "Waldos" (because they liked to sit on a wall and watch people go by), attended San Rafael High School in California in 1971. They met each day at a statue of Louis Pasteur at exactly 4:20 p.m. to fire up a joint. Over time "420" became their code word for their happy time and all that went with it. They found they could talk about it in front of their parents by using the term 420 and the old man would be none the wiser. The term leaked into popular culture when the Waldos attended Grateful Dead concerts and shared their lingo with other Deadheads.

So here's to you Mr. Sitting on a Wall with a Silly Grin Laughing at All the Squares Bustling Through Their Tormented Lives! This bud's for you!

Happy 420 Day Everyone!

Here's some of the t-shirts most often seen at the University of Colorado 420 Festival...

How to Do a Keg Stand

2008-02-28T20:30:00.000-05:00

It's not a college party now without the inevitable kegstand. While many young hooligans get started in high school, the keg stand becomes required once you hit the university ranks. If you've never seen it done before, we proudly offer you this video guide on "How to Do a Keg Stand."

Once you've got it down and you're ready to pound some beers, here some funny t-shirts to wear to your next keg party...

"Take A Stand" - Funny Keg Stand T-Shirt

"Lucky Keg Stand" - Funny Drinking Party T-Shirt

"999 Keg Stand of the Beast" - Funny Drinking Halloween Party T-Shirt

St. Patrick's Day T-Shirts

2008-02-20T20:44:00.000-05:00

Yup, every year it's the same thing. You look forward to St. Patrick's Day because it's one of the few holidays of the year where you're encouraged to drink beer in massive quantities, get wasted, be obnoxious, hook up with someone you'll regret the next morning and potentially offend all your friends.

What could be better than that?

Well not so fast my friend.

"Are you wearing green?"

"No, why do you ask?... OUCH!! What the Fuck?!!!"

Next thing you know some jackass pinches you in places you would never want a loser like that to even look at.

Of course you could always try the old dodge...

"I've got green underwear on."

"Prove it."

Crap.

Well my friend, this would not have happened if you had gotten yourself a snazzy St Patty's Day tee. Kick back and enjoy, as we look at some of the best t-shirts to wear to celebrate the wearin' of the green!

Best T-Shirt for Natural Redhead Irish Girls

"Irish Girl!" This shirt is a clever parody of the Sopranos' Bada Bing strip club logo that highlights Irish pride, shamrocks, beautiful girls, natural redheads, and general flirtiness all in one fell swoop. You've got a touch of green, so you wear it for your St. Pats party and year round... if you're Irish, female, red haired, and hot or any combination thereof.

Best T-Shirt for Blonde Irish Girls

Hey, we can't all be hot gingers. This shirt is a nice also-ran for the blondes and brunettes. You've got the "Irish Girl!" text with the mudflap girl silhouette in green.

Best T-Shirt for Hooking Up

This shirt works for both girls and guys. "I'm Magically Delicious" It's a great conversation starter. "I'll show my pink heart if you let me see your yellow moon." or "Check out my purple horseshoe!" Everyone will be after your lucky charms. Even Dane Cook could get laid with this shirt.

Best Shirt for Nerds that Know How to Party

Duff Green! Nothing gives you street cred like Simpson's references. Remember when Homer took the tour of Duff Gardens brewing facilities and we saw that Duff, Duff Lite, Duff Dry and Skittlebrau all drew from the same tap? Hilarious. Well we know that DuffMan loves to party and get his Irish on. Enter Duff Green!

Best Shirt for Hardcore Party People

Lucky Keg Stand T-Shirt. This shirt is for year round partiers. Spring Break, Cinco De Mayo, Halloween, you name it. If there's a party, this is the shirt to wear.

Best Shirt Belligerant Drunks Who Like to Start Fights

You know that guy. He's probably about 5 feet tall, chain smokes and takes everything personally. You put your life on the line every time you go to the bar with him 'cause he expects you to "back him up" - not because he needs any help but because that what friends do. He may not be an Irishman, but he probably drinks like one. That cheeky little leprechaun!

Best T-Shirt for Smart Asses

"I Pissed on the Blarney Stone" Every day tourists travel thousands of miles to kiss the Blarney Stone, a block of bluestone built into the battlements of Blarney Castle in County Cork, Ireland. According to legend, kissing the stone endows the kisser with the gift of gab (great eloquence or skill at flattery). What those hapless touristas don't realize is that the night before, the locals get tanked at their local pub on Guinness and Irish whiskey and stop by the castle to relieve themselves on the county's most famous tourist attraction. The next day, the hungover locals howl with laughter as fat pale tourists delight in pressing their lips to the stone only to turn their nose when they encounter the acrid smell of stale urine.

You could be that guy. Or at least claim you are with this classic t-shirt.

Winchester Tavern

2008-02-08T21:17:00.000-05:00

Enjoy this video tribute to the Winchester, Shaun and Ed's favorite pub in the classic comedy film "Shaun of the Dead." Set to the opening theme music from the TV show Cheers "Where Everybody Knows Your Name."

Get the Winchester Tavern T-Shirt